Best Dream of 2018

I had my best dream of 2018 last night, best because it was vivid. I was at a party, and by that I mean a pleasant social gathering with good and gentle folk, and I was seated beside a large and talkative, crafty woman with many ideas and much wit, who was talking to me about things I no longer remember upon waking. It is often the case, that I dream of being talked to, even at great length, and when I awake, can remember naught but the faintest outline, or possibly a single phrase. I do recall one of her friends bringing me a good drink (non-alcoholic, quite naturally, as I no longer indulge in intoxicants), and then she turned to me and with some charming witticism, induced me to rise and fetch her a drink. She said she liked a soda called "The Bossman," which I recognized as a sweet citrus carbonated soda.

Upon waking, probably due to allergies, this being ragweed season, I thought she might be my boss, for one, a natural enough assumption, or else a thought-form based upon the detritus floating through my mind, and possibly an amalgam combining my boss with a charming personality I watched on YouTube not long ago, a young, black woman talking about her religion, Wicca, in mild, gentle and reasonable language. I liked her and thought she was smart.

I don't recall anything of deep or profound meaning in the dream, but I did enjoy a rather nice conversation with an interesting entity in my dream, even if I remember little more than a dozen words of what was said! (And of those words, some permutation of "fetch me a drink" was the gist!)

I do think one of the most potent attractions in the practice of Wicca and other minority religions is quite simple and based in psychology. The mere fact that a religion does not have many millions of pushy advocates on its behalf is the attraction. That it can be practiced in solitary is quite useful. That it is adaptable and open to a certain degree of experimentation and improvisation is almost unique. Christianity and Islam have both become rather stodgy by comparison, full of rules and group-think and group-activities. The room for personal revelation and personal relationships to the Divine seems limited and dismal in those religions, which surrender spiritual power from the individual to the shaman. Where power and politics get involved, spirituality flees. Also there is the fact that, being new, Wicca has not accumulated, yet, such a large number of terrible scandals, and may it never do so, but I fear, in time, it too will succumb to human frailty, as humans do what humans sometimes do, which is to fail. Yes, everyone and everything suffers a setback once in a while, that is the nature of things.

I am more an admirer of Wicca than a practitioner. The ambivalence I feel for Nature is the main reason. Wicca is really tied to Nature, to the observance of days on a calendar and a rather sentimental and emotional regard for things living and dead. The great outdoors and to a lesser extent, environmentalism, both political and personal, are both key to understanding and participating in the faith. I have never cared a fig for the phase of the Moon and doubt I could start now. To me, the Moon and indeed the planets are abstract notions. I admire them rather vaguely and am aware they are there, and like to learn about them, but don't really see them as influencing me that much. After all, they are material. If the Moon could influence me, then how much more so could the floor beneath my feet, and perhaps I should study the phases of the floor, and learn what angle it lies at, and the composition thereof. No, I dwell in the realm of thoughts and really always have and never liked camping or spending too much time in the rough. I hated going camping in Scouts. I like all of the conveniences of civilization and the wondrous artificial comfort zones we have created with our science. Science is the magic of the material plane we dwell in, whereas magic is of the spirit.

Of course, another big attraction to Wicca for many women is simply that there are many female Wiccans, and the relatively smaller number (I imagine) of male Wiccans tend to be feminists or at least open to the notion of equality between the sexes. I do not know what qualifies a man to be termed a feminist in the eyes of a female feminist; perhaps no man could qualify. It is true that some feminists really are down on men, but this is probably because of the misbehavior of so many men, the brutish louts, who behave with reckless criminality and abuse and outrage the gentle sex. There must be some reason that all the wars have been waged by mostly men, and mostly men inhabit the prisons of the world and do the violent crimes of the world. That reason has to do with testosterone and the negative aspects to it that are reinforced by culture and upbringing. I am not sure what the solutions may be, but the best, it seems to me, is to evolve a sexless mortal, with neither gender, for what need have we of gender, if a laboratory offers a better option. But that is far into the future, when I have already checked out, I think.

Republican Hypocrisy

Every little thing that the long-aggrieved, much-complaining Republicans griped about the Clintons and Obama, Trump does a thousandfold worse. The list of his corruptions could fill this blog. Basically, when one wants to know the ideal Republican, study Trump, that is what the Republican strives to become. It is their very highest spiritual ideal, what they strive for in their fondest prayers, the summit of their aspirations. To become Trump: to cheat, lie and swindle on a grand scale, is what every Republican wants to do, in the secret truth of their soul. Failing that, they reach for the gun, go out and kill the innocent, acting out their fondest fantasies of murder, much-repeated fantasies that represent the summit of their desolate imaginations.

Stark Choice in 2018

Trump's victory in 2016 was the ringing of the bell of Hell, summoning up the infernal legions and gathering all evil unto him, awakening the criminals, murderers and all men harboring evil in their hearts, followed by the hand-wringing of angels. In 2018, the American people have been presented two stark choices for the November election:

-hatred, racism, murder, and political violence in the Republicans
-compassion, reason, ethics and moderation in the Democrats

It may well be that America choices the former, madness and violence. After all, Germany did once, and so did Russia. Is America better? That remains to be seen. Those who possess even a tiny ounce of goodness in their souls will vote Democrat. Those that have sworn in the darkness to an indifferent Master will vote Republican. Although, others may opt not to vote at all, which just means they are lazy in addition to being evil, perhaps a less virulent form of wickedness. Such people would abandon their country when their country needs them.

New problems? No, old.

With so many negative headlines about crimes, violence, corruption, cheating, lying, stealing, racism, homophobia, xenophobia, police brutality, incivility, and so on, one might be tempted to despair about the world, society, or the age we live in. Let me be clear, that is a temptation sent by none other than the Devil, if you will. Not that I really believe in a Devil, but he certainly is a convenient chap by way of conversation.

Resist the temptation! Our age is no worse than any other. Our society, rather better, I would think. Our nation, we have a right to be proud of, next to the likes of ugly China or rotting Russia. Be proud! I do not endorse the "bended knee" thing among NFL players for the reason that it just seems too trendy and not thoughtful enough.

Think back to forty years ago, to 1978, please. Back then, police did not wear body cameras, nor did their dashboards host cameras, nor did any of the rooms in the police department or even the courtroom. Judges, police and civil servants largely did as they liked, and sometimes got away with it. Criminals of all stripes got away with a great many things in 1978. Bullies could beat the crap out of weaker kids. I know, I saw it happen. Teachers could say whatever nasty thing popped into their little head and get away with it, and often they could slap, hit or fondle a student and get away with it. Folks got away with stealing, lying, cheating, even killing, and there are headlines and news articles about such things.

There is not more crime now, there is less. Crime has gotten to be far more difficult to get away with. Criminals tend to be apprehended far more often than in 1978. There is less racism, less homophobia, less xenophobia, less ignorance and stupidity in the public arena. Of course there are going to be exceptions, but one must remember, these exceptions used to be the norm.

You have to admit, things are getting better. They are getting better all the time.

Megyn Kelly

Megyn Kelly has had an interesting career, to say the least, and is an interesting celebrity. Long was she derided as a "dumb blonde" by leftists, but Jon Stewart was one of the first to acknowledge that she is actually bright, a violinist in fact. First she was at Fox News, then when the sex scandal blew up over there, she moved to Fox's nemesis, NBC, which has been a bit of a culture shock for her to say the least. Comments that would barely raise eyebrows on Fox are grounds for dismissal on NBC. It is true, there is intolerance on the left for certain words and phrases. I guess it is because the assumption is that highly privileged, wealthy, highly educated and well-informed celebrities should know better than to behave in any sexist or racist manner and that everything they do is calculated. Megyn Kelly earns enough money, she could hire a sociologist full-time to keep her informed about history, culture and society. I think, however, that celebrities remain like us--human beings. Generally, I would say, give the benefit of the doubt, and at least impose a three-strikes rule. Strike one, warning. Strike two, suspension. Only on strike three, dismissal. Something like that. However, in the celebrity world (as in the world of us little people!) enemies are always on the lookout for any sign of weakness, the slightest faltering, and ready to swoop in and replace you at a moment's notice. Ruthlessness and cuthroatery! There are plenty of aspiring young actresses that would love to earn twenty-three million dollars a year talking on the television. Wow, work for a year, you're set for life!

On a personal level, I am willing to overlook comments and phrases, in the first place because we all have to, as they are commonplace. I can't begin to count the number of non-PC comments I have heard in the workplace and everywhere else. Everyone is just muddling through this strange and complicated experience we call life. The people grope for simple answers, and what is simpler than black and white? A charming simplicity, as though skin color meant anything at all. For the same reason, people buy one brand of cereal over another, because the box is green instead of red, and they don't like the color red. On a similar level, many Jamaicans, who are black, discriminate against, even hate (!), LGBT individuals, even though they may not know any on a personal level. I read an article the other day written by a Jamaican lesbian who said she was scared to death to come out to her family, because she is certain they would disown her, as they disowned her lesbian cousin. So, all kinds of ignorance and prejudice are commonplace, and certainly white folk don't have a monopoly on it. What we all do have is a responsibility, as human beings, to strive toward the light, to try and get ourselves better, to understand more fully. Some people just don't make the effort, don't feel like it is worth bothering with.

Is it so, as often repeated, that "Love is the answer?" Or as is sometimes put, "Love is the law, the only law?"

No, I think love is overrated, myself. A lot of people don't want any love. They just want to be left alone. Perhaps there is a better word to choose, if one is crafting a law describing moral conduct. Noninterference? A Libertarian law.

Election Predictions

In the past, the formula has always held true that if the economy is good, then the ruling party remains in power. If the economy is bad, the ruling party is voted out. The American people are just like any other people in that they want to do well for themselves. If only nations could come together and realize that greater prosperity can be had through cooperation than competition--but leaders like Xi and Putin will never accept that, in a million years, because it is contrary to the place where their souls reside.

By the above formula, the Republicans should do well. They are giving themselves credit for the Obama recovery, and perhaps many people do believe that the Republicans, late on the scene, are responsible all of a-sudden for the booming economy. Certainly, tax cuts on business never hurts! Common sense tells as much. The deficit, which the Republicans worried about so much under Clinton and Obama, is abruptly a nonissue now that the Republicans are in power. Look at charts--spending always goes up under Republicans. They have not the discipline to keep their hands out of the cookie jar. One day, the bill will come due, and it may present a huge problem, and retirees are likely to bear the brunt, because in the end, retirees are expendable. The pattern for local governments has always been, screw the retirees out of their pensions.

I predict that the Democrats will do moderately well, making a strong showing, but not a landslide. Certainly, Democrats and independents have been given enough motivation and presented with a stark difference in every kind of policy under the Sun. There is no reason for voter apathy. The irony is, Trump has some good ideas along with the bad, but anytime one unscrews a huge jar of marbles and pours them on the floor, sure, somebody is bound to trip and fall into Truth, and that is what Trump did. A lot of marbles also went and tripped up the poor, the sick, transgendered, and immigrants. Trump to me represents meanness, cruelty. He has resurrected racism and given the demon a powerful new lease on life. He has also resurrected fascism around the world. He is no different than his predecessors in spending entirely too much money on the military, fooling around too much in the Middle East, and not paying enough attention to the threat posed by global warming. It is not popular nowadays to talk about global warming, but it hasn't gone away, and in the end, poses a greater threat to the United States than these sock-puppet regimes in the Middle East. Losing the cities of our coasts may secretly please cynical Republicans, who see them as liberal meccas full of minorities, but it will also waste away the bulk of the nation's wealth, for without the coastal cities, we are Canada. If the U.S. does not lead on global warming, no one will.

I don't really see a monumental regime change underway in the upcoming election, but I could well be wrong. I don't feel inspired. The economy is really the main thing for most people. It is difficult for the average person to grapple with big issues like global warming, foreign policy or even national policy. What people want is a safe job, a way to make a good living. The rest is kind of icing on the cake. Republicans opted to borrow from tomorrow in order to throw themselves a nice big party today. Perhaps that will work out for them in the short-term. Not yet have they told the old people, no Social Security for you.

We Need an American President

I am voting American in the next election. All we have now is some guy that represents his own tribe all the time. Basically gives the middle finger to the rest of us. Everything has to go his way all the time, and the only problem he ever sees is Democrats. Well, he hasn't killed us all yet, we still have plenty of fight left. I think he is not an American and hates America with every fiber of his being. What he wants is for America to be like Russia. That's his fondest hope and dream. Either Russia, North Korea, or China. Sometimes he gets a little disloyal with Russia, likes to flirt with the other two dictatorships. Too bad, in 2020, he will discover, he does not live in North Korea. He lives in a place where there is an election. He never won an election before and just got in because of the Electoral College. He wouldn't have even won that without a lot of help from the media. Time to vote American instead of party.

Thieves, crooks, and liars. That's the kind of litmus test Trump set out as requirements for all his appointees. The reason turnover has been so high in the White House is that a lot of people have morals. That's a huge problem for the servant of evil. How can he fulfill his Master's dictates, when there are people following their conscience? It's a big problem for poor old Trump. Another Stormy Daniels he has to weather.

Stephen Hawking's Predictions

He predicts superhumans will take over. I agree 100% with the gentleman. Tough luck for all those folks fixated on pumping out babies. You will need a genius I.Q. to compete in the future. Otherwise, only occupation? Organ donor.

Thought I'd Seen It All

On YouTube tonight, I learned that the couple behind the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn is for Trump (and even watch InfoWars/Fox News pretty regular). They went over the top, dressing as the Prez and the First Lady, although they didn't go to the trouble of putting wigs on. Political theater in a series of videos supposedly about the occult.

I guess they want to be timely and relevant and reach out to a market niche, right-wing, American occultists. I wonder how big that market niche is and how lucrative. I wonder if they are the occult's Diamond and Silk. Maybe that is how their prosperity spell really works.

I haven't heard them say anything I disagree with on magic, yet. I actually like them on a personal level. Charismatic, after a fashion. I don't like the emphasis on "war" though. Conflict sells, of course. They have launched a magical war to counteract some clown that practices black magic against Trump voters. Why give the turkey more attention, is my reaction. First I ever heard of the clown, and this couple are jumping up and down getting excited and angry about the absurdity. Just relax, such a poseur could not possibly muster the power of a mustard seed. Absurd, the whole thing. I also don't like their use of the term "war". It seems every other headline on Fox News has "war" in the title. You know, these United States have had about enough wars as it is. We could use peace to rebuild the country, with all these failing roads and bridges and poor Internet service. Certainly the last couple of wars we had have been total wastes. Even Trump himself agrees on that score. I certainly do agree with Trump that we would have been better off not getting involved in Afghanistan or Iraq. Another of Hillary's little failings, her support of these expensive wars. Siding with the Republicans brought her no benefits, no Republican votes. Bad move politically. Might as well have gone full Progressive and opposed the wars. No war would have placed the country in a better position to pay for health care.

Certainly, no one can fault their little ritual desiring freedom for all of humanity. They seem pretty open-minded. Certainly more appealing than the politician they support. I have to question their judgment in following Alex Jones though. I couldn't imagine quoting that guy in any context. I also find their histrionics tedious. Channeling emotion doesn't make one seem either sincere or powerful. More like, TV preacher. Calm down, Jethro.

I think they suffer from a case of overreaction. A constant diet of right-wing media, coupled with their lifelong focus on magic and their messianic desire to save the world, results in this street theater where they are "saving" Trump from bad witches and, I imagine, bad Hollywood. I'm not sure why Hollywood is so bad, or appreciably worse than other industries, I guess because Hollywood is a liberal power center that donates to Democrats, is why Hollywood is bad. Certainly a lot of television shows are not worth watching, but when has that not been true? Most books are not worth reading, for that matter. I suppose in their view, academia must be bad too, and of course unions and minorities--anyone that donates to the baddies, the Dems.

They do take great pains to differentiate "bad" witches from "good" witches. Well, to the average American, it's all nonsense or else dangerous self-delusion. You know what, Trump can protect himself, he doesn't need that much help, he is a pretty skilled magician in his own right, and I mean that in every sense of the word. I can think of a lot of other causes that are worthy besides helping someone rich and powerful. Which brings to mind the distinct possibility that all their theatrics might be serving their little prosperity spell. Nothing is ever spoken about the corruption and dishonesty so apparent in Trump himself. If you want to present yourself as fair and balanced, it helps to admit that which is true, and concede that your support of this or that politician is nuanced. Instead, they just play partisan politics, no objectivity other than a token objectivity, thin and dubious. Come on, you are Republican shills, trying to reach out to New Agers and flip them red.

In the end, everybody has to be taken with a grain of salt, even the supposed teachers.

On other levels, besides the political--which, I don't know why they had to go there in the first place, quite bizarre, as though they want to get on TV and are looking after their pet ambitions--I dislike their tendency to muster fake emotion. At any rate, it just rings false. They are mimicking these guys on TV. I guess that is the whole point of going on YouTube, because TV is where the money is. They get on Fox News, they get a lot of money.

Also, there is a tendency they have to repeat themselves. The broken record syndrome. Make your point, move on, don't keep harping on it again and again like Fox News. I really think they learned all their presentation techniques from Fox News. Same point, regurgitated fifty times over in fifty different ways.

The other thing that grates is a new tendency I have observed to employ profanity, like bulls--. O.K., that is not the worst profanity ever, but it is sloppy and brings to mind drinking and belching. I know everyone does it these days on both the left and the right. Everyone is wrong. I am like a lone voice crying out in the wilderness, few people hold to the old standard anymore, but I believe in a certain level of decorum, but this holds even more so when discussing the holy.

I'm pleased to note, however, that they seem to be O.K. with gays, which hasn't always been the case with these occult orders. Specifically on their web site, they state they do not discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation. That is a relief, because gays get enough heat from the various right-wing religions. They are also not racist, needless to say. That all sounds good to me. About damn time, too. Although, it may be that they just don't want to turn off potential customers. There is probably less money to be had in homophobia these days than in tolerance.

What's off-putting is that they are hardcore conspiracy theorists, joined at the hip, it would seem, with Alex Jones of InfoWars. Making a lot of outrageous claims without much in the way of evidence. You know, evidence is important. Without evidence, everybody can be guilty. I suppose astral, psychic thinkadees informed them of such things--well, one can be mistaken. It is important to retain the critical faculties when evaluating messages and information gathered from the astral. Our senses and reasoning are not lesser in value. We were gifted with reason ... for a reason.

Every show, besides the obligatory -New Age- -Magic- Golden Dawn- -Spiritual Work- -Witchcraft- ...there's this recurrent theme of, oh, how put-upon poor little old Trump is, the innocent one, can't the media lay off of all his lies, deceit and corruption? Let the goodly Saint Trump lie, cheat and steal all he wants, because after all, he is a Saint. The Golden Dawn has sanctified his horns. Oh yeah, Trump rides a Unicorn and farts perfume. Disgusting. They take the Holy, put it in the toilet and mingle it with Trump. Must be nice, finding a way to make magic pay in real cold hard cash.

Hopefully, one day these two will confess their relationship with politics and quit using New Age beliefs as a ploy to get attention. Religion is not your whore. If you are about spiritual advancement, then be about that. Sounds to me like they are just about padding their own pocketbooks by talking all the time about how put upon poor billionaire Trump is. They prostitute their knowledge in the service of darkness. They are not the first and by no means will be the last. This is exactly why many masters of old insisted upon secrecy and did not wish to share knowledge with everyone. Eventually some bright fellow figures out a way to commercialize, cheapen, use for base and tawdry ends. It always happens.

In the beginning, when I watched the two, I thought, ah, they believe what I believe, maybe I will learn something from them. Now, I think, these two buffoons believe otherwise, my beliefs are not at all like theirs, they wish to talk only about Trump and about Republican politics, that is their religion. They do not have any spiritual thoughts in their bodies. So in my mind they are no different than the televangelists and others that seem to make a business out of spirit. I suppose it beats working for a living, eh?

Butterfly

A butterfly shows the difference between human beings.

Some encounter a butterfly and admire its beauty.

Others rip the wings off to watch it suffer.

Prayer

I have come to the conclusion that a prayer-less world is not necessarily a desirable one for human beings. There is comfort and consolation to be had in prayer that cannot be gotten from other human beings so well and certainly not on the Internet!

If one is atheist and places great value on being consistent, logical, and rational, and yet, has a habit of drinking or of using drugs, then an accusation presents itself. J'accuse! You are already engaged in an irrational habit, these twelve-ounce curls you do every day with a can of beer, detrimental to body and/or mind. Why, then, should you avoid prayer, which is equally irrational, yet not in any way detrimental to health? Indeed, there have been numerous studies indicating that prayer has measurable benefits to body and mind. That, to me, was quite persuasive when I read it, and I have found through direct experience that genuine, unforced, sincere prayer is extremely satisfying, wholesome and beneficial. The trouble with prayer and with religion when growing up was it was forced. Church was compulsion, Sundays were forced attendance, and even one of my high school teachers forced us to pray. Religion can become drudgery, tedium, an object of contempt. Some people take that which is beautiful and precious and twist it until it is horrible beyond recognition. They present God as a projection of their dark self, a Punisher, a Tormenter, a Torturer, vindicative, vengeful and ruthless. That reflects their own nature only, not the nature of the most high. Such lies and distortions get in the way of spirituality and must be discarded.

China is crazy, radical atheist, and seems bent on realizing the dystopia of "1984", with state surveillance of everyone and thought control. It is difficult to see the charm in a completely atheistic viewpoint. The fact remains, gods are fun, and not believing is just negation, it doesn't offer half the fun of believing or at least, suspending disbelief.

Spirituality evolved to help an intelligent, thinking mind adapt to the pressures and the stresses brought on by knowledge. Of course, knowledge is not all good. There is a huge downside. We know, for instance, quite well that we will grow old and die. That is a terrible knowledge to have. We know that we are bound to worry and fear from cradle to grave. We worry about health, first of all, our own and our loved ones. We worry about losing money, losing friends, losing loved ones. All of these fears, doubts and stresses are really brought on by knowledge and intelligence. If we were only stupider! It sounds funny, but if we were stupid like the animals, our blessed stupidity would make us perfectly immune to worrying about death or indeed, worrying about tomorrow at all.

Prayer allows one the luxury of working as a team, that is, in conjunction with that which is good, with God or the gods, whichever one prefers. No, I do not believe there is only one way, one correct doctrine or theology. I have my opinion, other people have theirs, but in the end, we are fallible, and may both be right somehow. That is not a very satisfying answer to rigid binary thinkers that want to know exact answers to everything. Learn to deal with ambiguity! The mysteries are all about ambiguity. That is why they are named such. The first and best virtue is to be humble. Every day, we are reminded, each of us in our own way, of our essential humanity, when we go to the bathroom to perform the necessary. So, live and let live, is the guiding principle, and I think God or the gods, howsoever one wishes to approach the Divine, both understand and endorse tolerance in religion, provided, of course, that YE HARM NONE.

The only real doctrine I think is mandatory is harm none, which seems to me quite a reasonable law to apply to all belief systems under the Sun. Nor harm thyself. Now when we see the radical Islamists go off and torture some poor wretch, for instance, that leads me to condemn radical Islam, and in general I don't like the punitive and oppressive laws that are found in many Muslim countries. I think sometimes religion gets a big head and wants to intrude into public and private affairs too much, and that is inappropriate. Each thing in its proper place, is the way to go. If the Muslims wish to worship a certain way, fine and dandy, but don't stop the selling of pork in the marketplace, or cut off people's hands if they shoplift a pack of gum. I would not wish to live in Iran or Saudi Arabia.

High School was a Low Point

Regular beatings and humiliation were a fact of daily life my freshman year at high school. It was just an ordinary high school, not a military one, but I think in many ways it was run like a military school, with strict rules and regimens. The main instigator was a twisted sociopath in P.E., and he was encouraged and enabled by the teacher. The drill-sergeant approach to education is claimed to work for some, perhaps, more or less, but didn't work out so well in my case. Does that mean that I was "weak" and another, ideal specimen was "strong" to thrive in a violent, abusive environment? Are regular beatings good for people? Some do think so, whether they will admit it or not, but perhaps they should try it out for themselves sometime, on the receiving end, that is. Then poll their opinion after they have received a good dose. I imagine that "boot camp" is meant to prepare one for war by lowering ones threshold for pain, lowering ones morality and reducing inhibitions. If we are at war, fine, maybe that is a necessary evil indeed, but if not, is it necessary? How much violence is really needed in the world?

I am reminded of what I endured by what some people are dredging up into the news media ten, twenty, thirty years after the fact, or longer. It seems to me that the only difference between these ancient cases and mine is that I was never confronted with someone else's genitals. That seems like a minor point next to a year's worth of physical and psychological abuse. Basically, abuse was a part of the system in school, it was normal and accepted everyday life for a lot of students. Survival of the fittest was the philosophy. No one really cared, the atmosphere was highly competitive and no one would pick you up if you fell--more likely, kick you in the ribs. The result, well, I think I have done about as well as I could with this life, given the sort of start I had. If I had to do things over, I would have set my mind to figuring out a way to avoid the dreadful high school I went to. It was a waste of time, not helpful in any way, and not educational in the slightest. I would have been much better off simply being locked in a library for eight hours a day. In a library, I would have absorbed the knowledge of the world and emerged in four years knowing a lot about a lot. School taught nothing, except people are morons, brutes and liars. That was the basic lesson, drilled daily, with tests all the time, and God help you if you forgot. Although, God wasn't around, because the Church just sold a whole load of generalities and called it spirituality. Whatever. Church never seemed satisfying to me and never made me feel even slightly closer to divinity.

Now, I finally know what education really is. Education is learning on your own, by yourself, at your own pace, fast or slow. I finally know what spirituality is. Spirituality is having a personal relationship with the greater powers, free of nonsense and window-dressing, just plain, straight-up communion, guided by common sense and a desire for that which is good.

The two criminals, that violent sociopath and the P.E. teacher that always turned a blind eye or, when he noticed, opted to blame the victim, succeeded in their objective, if their goal was to cost me a lot of suffering and lost time, lost future wages and lost prospects. They achieved their dark victory. If there is justice in the Universe, if Karma is real, as Donald Michael Kraig fervently believes, judging by his opinions in "Modern Magick," then their payback for their sins would be great. I myself rather doubt the existence of karma, based on what we know about various historical figures. Good does not always prosper, not is evil always vanquished or punished in any way. Sometimes good people are harmed with impunity, and evil-doers enjoy their lives to the very end of their days. I think rather that Karma is a useful construct, make-believe, that Kraig and many other would-be philosophers like to indoctrinate their students with in the hope and the prayer of spreading goodness and light through the world. But I don't really believe in Policeman Karma watching and weighing rights and wrongs and sanctioning wrong-doers. Would it were so, but alas, the Universe does seem oblivious to the cries of humble folk. I think we are regarded by divinity, if at all, in the same light as ants and bees, as pixels in a greater picture, and that what happens to us in this lifetime is not really evaluated, but kind of left up to chance.

I learned in high school, the villains seize fun and pleasure and get away with it, and those that harm none can suffer for a long time. It was kind of a reverse morality lesson, learning evil in school. My moral instructors were the bully and the P.E. teacher. It took years to unlearn those lessons. That is about the summit of what happened in high school. Not, in my opinion, a judicious use of taxpayer dollars. Did the P.E. teacher earn his salary? No. Where was karma? Missing in action. I did not even think about karma in those days, because I had a more traditional view of the Universe. I thought, where is God? I did not observe any hints of true Christianity in school. Maybe a number of students professed Christianity, that is, if you asked them, oh sure, even been born again and all that jazz, but it was like brand-name clothing they wore to boast and brag about their piety. Now P.E. was a pretty big class, over thirty of my peers, and they knew exactly what was going on, every one of them, they witnessed him and me. Not a word nor an action. Their indifference did not pass unmarked by me. Indeed it was taken into consideration in order to form a worldview. That is what happens in youth, forming of the worldview. Now, my worldview has evolved since then, for sure, for the better, I think. But then I thought, this world is evil, all are evil. In darkness man dwells. And many a time, I thought to open my veins.

What stayed my hand? Why did I choose to remain in this world? I think memories of happier times, a vague notion that "This, too, shall pass," and my inner optimism. Certainly I am pleased that my younger self did not take any drastic action. It was true, life did get better. I got out of that hell-hole school, did much better in college where I was freer and more independent and not forced to sit in assigned seating in some stupid P.E. class with a stupid know-nothing instructor. I was able to make a living and be independent, and that is good enough for me.

The concept of Karma does interest me. I really want to believe in it, a just Universe, but you know, setting my own personal hell-story aside, along with all my own personal experiences, just crack open a history book. What the hell kind of karma did the victors of every war receive for all their killing and destruction? Certainly plenty of generals and dictators have gone on to enjoy a cushy retirement. Look at Napoleon, for one. You can say Russia was karma, and I would reply, karma for his troops, while Napoleon himself went on to stir up trouble the next ten years and eventually idle his remaining days in exile.

Scanning the Headlines

On a daily basis, there is nothing to do but scan the headlines each day, just to check whether WW3 is breaking out.

There is nothing a poor, humble ordinary citizen can do until election-time rolls around. Then, I feel, it is one's duty to vote. The country does not ask terribly much in the way of duty. To vote is a small thing, denied only by the petty. I think personally it is a sin not to vote, to not have any engagement at all with representative democracy. That way opens the door to dictatorship. People do not realize, voting is new. We are one of the very few generations to have the privilege. Some people simply never paid attention in history class.

I try to avoid getting too wrapped up in the headlines, the news buzz of the day. Much gets blown all out of proportion. Every politician gets criticized more than is their due, merely for acting in ways that would ensure they get reelected. It is human nature to want to succeed at what one does, to not want to fail, so it is human nature for a politician to want to get reelected.

Really, many disagreements over policy boil down to tribe A vs. tribe B, the two tribes simply not getting along, one desiring power over the other. In the United States, the whites fear ceding power to the browns, which really goes far in explaining the difference between the Republicans and the Democrats. The differences between the parties are complicated and numerous, but the similarities are greater than the differences. In reality, the Democrats and Republicans agree on far more than they disagree upon. Republicans favor a strong class system, rewarding both birthright and merit. An aristocracy is favored. Meanwhile, the poor are kept so, by and large, kept in their place and their numbers reduced through attrition. I think it is fair to say the Republicans believe government can't solve problems, and that evolution should be allowed to take its course among the poorer classes. Those that get an unlucky roll of the dice in health or birth should endure it or die, so that the rich may enjoy a better cake, with more gold and silver ornaments. I can't think why else there would be such opposition to health care, which is extremely expensive, there is no doubt. Perhaps they may even be right, that vast numbers should sacrifice and stop reproducing. If eugenics really took hold, then perhaps the result would be a healthier population, in the end. Getting to that end, there would be unhappiness. Does the end justify the means? At any rate, the national debt increases with no end in sight, so eventually, more sacrifices will arise. More than likely, if history repeats itself, the working class will have to pay all the national debt by sacrificing its Social Security, and all the aged and infirm will be told, "Go back to work. Become a Wal-Mart greeter or work in the Amazon warehouse," even at seventy-five.

I was hoping that the Republicans could really make health care better, which is to say more efficient, but they seem to work for the health care industry. I am afraid that the Democrats do, too. Both parties are sold out, unfortunately. I wonder who is representing the poor working American? Everything these days seems to be based upon how much money can be raised. I know that health care stocks in general have been rising by double digits every year. I think that if the Federal government took a strong hand, then much fraud and waste could be eliminated. That was my half-hope when Trump took office, that he would bully the industry into making needed reforms, but instead, he just sought to eliminate the government's involvement in health care altogether. I suppose if one is sick, that is not the problem of the government, but of the individual, and there is always an option to open an artery, rejoin the Earth and be replaced, like a malfunctioning robot. One day, perhaps there will be no need for workers at all, and the whims of the rich can be served by an army of robots, who need no health care or retirement benefits, and don't vote Democrat, let alone vote or express any opinion at all. Paradise?

Sing a Song of Sobriety

I am proud of being sober.

True, it is a modest accomplishment. People like my mother thought nothing of it. To her, sobriety came naturally, was a done deal, always active. Sobriety is not a positive good, per se. It is merely the absence of a vice.

H. Sapiens, including many people I know and many people we read about in the media, has a huge problem with drinking in particular and also other drugs. That is why I am proud to be sober, because other folks aren't. I can look at them and think, well, I'm better off, wiser, stronger, etc. In reality, perhaps, just a modicum. It is a small thing. Perhaps I have grown ambitious. I want to find more in this life, see more meaning, and I see no meaning in a bottle, none at all. I see the desire for death in the bottle, and it seems to me, so many people are weary of this mortal coil, and in their hearts wish to fade and disappear, to which end, drinking serves like rocket fuel. For the thinking mind gets retarded by the progress of alcohol, and base animals we become under its influence.

To drink is irrational. Upon accepting that drinking is harmful, the mind must solve a riddle, why drink at all? Everywhere, at many social functions, drinks are offered, and booze is easy to come by, plentiful. Temptation is everywhere. Yet to a mind armored in the magic of NO, there is no temptation. This enchanted armor protects me. My gratitude and love increase every time I emerge from a store without clutching cans of poison. I know that I am no longer contributing to my own demise. I am not actively working to harm the self. Indeed this is what drinking is, or any drug use really, and also many other activities engaged in by humans. I hate to say it, but folks like to self-harm. I don't know of a better word for it. The mystical term I borrowed from Freud is Thanatos. Human beings are in thrall to Thanatos, the inverse, perhaps, to Apollo.

One must accept a certain level of boredom. Coping with boredom is one of the first skills a newly sober person must master. How to deal with bouts of boredom, anxiety, mild depression, and worry. Finding new coping methods is a big challenge. For me, I found that in abandoning one irrational practice--drinking--it helped to embrace another irrational practice--spirituality. There is no logical reason to believe in X, Y, or Z, but I feel that belief is unnecessary, even irrelevant. How can such an insignificant, temporary accumulation of cells suppose that it has gathered enough data to actually believe in something? No, working hypothesises are quite acceptable, as we grope our way through this dark and misty veil of the world, where so much is unknown and unseen, and our sensory apparatus so limited, and our knowledge so small. Belief, bah!

If necessary, make-believe. Nothing wrong with pretending, really, either consciously or unconsciously. The main thing is to be positive, to be aligned with that which is good and wholesome. Kindness, gentleness. As far as theology or theory or doctrine goes, that sort of things gets rewritten and revised every Aeon, and who knows, really? Perhaps some things are quite beyond full comprehension by the mortal mind, but is comprehension really necessary in the first place?

I would rather spend time contemplating Light than digesting alcohol sugars (and getting fatter and slower). Simple as that. I think being a touch anti-social actually helps, because so many self-congratulating, very self-satisfied social people I see require the drinking of alcohol in order to be social. If alcohol is the only way to be social, then perhaps it is not worth being social with such individuals. Sober people offer better company, in general.

Climate Change

Doomsy Day, as I call it, has been a popular subject since before our day, going back thousands of years.

The Atom Bomb is the most popular and prevalent catalyst supposed to bring about Doomsy Day. Prior to the advent of the Atom Bomb, people had to deal with diseases such as the Bubonic Plague that threatened to wipe out, if not everybody, a whole lot of people. Then the Christians were always fretting about God's Apocalypse, wherein anyone that wasn't right with Jesus had to pay the price--or be forgiven all their sins, depending on one's spin of religion. Plenty of religions have apocalyptic themes, because our ancestors had a rough life, and wrestled with diseases, warfare (often incessant), starvation and malnutrition, oppression, and even meteor strikes, hurricanes, floods and other calamities.

In my youth, we only really worried about the Atom Bomb, and it's still a worry, and isn't going away but is actually getting worse. The likelihood that some fool or group of fools is going to blast his enemies away with nuclear fission has increased, if anything. At least with the Cold War, you had a restricted number of nations in the "Nuclear Club," and the technology was all so new, that the foolish leaders were quite in awe of the weapons and reluctant to experiment with them. Nowadays every two-bit ignorant-as-hell regime on earth is hell-bent on getting nukes, and that scenario isn't going away anytime soon. Part of the problem is that the U.S. invaded Iraq and Afghanistan, alarming all the other two-bit, ignorant-as-hell regimes, to where they reckon they need nukes to protect against U.S. invasion. But you know, China is no walk in the park either, and may well start invading other countries too, one day soon.

Nowadays, climate change is the big boogie man, and just like nukes, I foresee NO SOLUTION, only pain and suffering for the world's population, not only of humans but all living creatures. Drastic, rapid change is going to result in a whole lot of death and poverty, and the poor people are not going to be taking it sitting down either, they are going to rise up, but they will face armies of drones hired by the rich to protect property. That is my sober (and sad) prediction. When times get tough, instead of pulling together, people often pull apart.

Of course, Republicans are extremely concerned about climate change. Not.

China doesn't seem too bothered, either, nor India, nor many other countries outside of Western Europe, and Western Europe has been enjoying a free ride on America's back for the past fifty years. They get to tariff us, and we don't tariff them back, and they get free military defense, while the U.S. taxpayer bears the whole cost. Nice, I'm sure they can fret over global warming under such a great situation.

Anyone living on the coast has to be asleep at the switch at some level. Every year is a roll of the dice. Although, I suppose for people over fifty, the thought may arise, not much time left anyway, and the good years are in the rear-view mirror anyway.

I think that environmentalists are too harsh on their fellow humans about climate change. Really, climate change is not something that H. Sapiens evolved to cope with. We do not have such high capacity. We are indeed fools. "What fools these mortals be!" as Shakespeare put it. Asking people to sacrifice thousands of dollars for a payoff in the distant future, when all these foreigners are not committed to sacrificing anything, is too much. Should Americans pay, yet again, to save the world, when we already saved the world from Nazism and Communism? Christ, we're not Christ. Can't somebody else step up? How about China? Well, China's a greedy, ruthless fascist state that cares nothing for anyone or anything save the enrichment of Communist Party leaders. Russia's a mafia state. What else is there? Europe is a Tower of Babel, too many different languages, cultures and petty little regional governments, they could never come together over the smallest thing, and they make foolish decisions anyway, like letting in the Islamist terrorists and forcing member states to accept knife attacks and bombs blowing up in coffee shops. The general man on the street does not particularly want to watch his body parts blast across the street, just because some politician wants to score points at an international conference.

So, the world can't do anything, because there's no leadership, and the only thing H. Sapiens is interested in is individual wealth and power. The good of all is a foreign concept, kind of a liberal, hippy notion.

At any rate, the world is a-changing, and there's no stopping change. Even the strong and the wise will be impacted. There is a great deal of random on the way. The best one can do is get prepared. Abandon the coast, first of all. That is rather obvious. Other than that, move North, because North is cooler, at least in these United States. Living in a tropical environment has not seemed to be a good thing economically, if we survey the countries of the world.

Trump the Grump

Trump the Grump earns a nickname, "The Father of Racism," for the ways he has divided the country between black and white. Such a base and low buffoon that tracks toilet paper into Air Force One.

As for Kavanothing (Kavanaught), who places so little value on honesty, he had better steer clear of the bottle. That was his downfall all along, and it shows how little he understands himself that he still swallows the old poison. He must really despise himself, to get up there and say what he said, just to get that office he wanted so badly. Keep on drinking, Kavanaught, you may be useful to us yet. Everything you do is now tied to the Republican Party.

Republicans just do whatever they want without any regard for ethics. Zero aspiration for the spiritual, zero value on truth, no affection for the country whatsoever. The only thing that can be said about them is they insist upon loyalty to party, which means lying and cheating all the time. Tell the truth for once, and you get kicked out.

What We Need

If Trump were sincere about making America great again, I'd vote Republican, sure as day. Sounds like he just wants to grind personal axes. Always with the partisan politics.

What we need in this country is pretty simple, nothing complicated about it, and I think this should be the Democratic Platform for 2020:

1. Better roads, highways, railroads, trains, trucks, and airports. Better transportation with fewer accidents; faster, efficient transportation.
2. Better Internet. High-speed (1G) Internet to *every* house in the U.S. of A. Yes, this should be a priority.
3. Better water. Everyone in the U.S.A. should feel confident that their tap water is safe to drink. Mothers should not have to buy bottled water to wash their babies.
4. Legal marijuana. The drug war needs to be significantly narrowed in scope. That does not mean, marijuana while driving. Only, legal marijuana, where you can buy it, in a sealed package, from a local store.
5. Continued tariffs against China, on into perpetuity. We need to shift all production away from China and to the U.S., or at least the next-best option, Mexico or Canada, our friends. China is certainly not our friend.
6. Immigrants should be allowed in a temporary visa, only on condition that they pay into Social Security and pay taxes. They should not qualify for any Social Security benefits. This would be a compromise to keep Social Security solvent for our nation's retirees. Yes, it is for them, but also for the nation's farmers. Mexican immigrants are just plain better at agriculture, period. Time to accept that. A little bit of honest work for the Mexicans would help both sides.

How to pay for all the above? Well, #4, #5, and #6 are income-producing plans, so actually we are talking about a net positive for the U.S. Treasury. More tax money being paid by immigrants, more money coming in from tariffs, and taxation on marijuana.

ACDSee SPAM

The worst thing you can do for a software company like ACDSee is buy their software. They don't know what to do with the money. They use it to churn out meaningless, unwanted spam emails, which they send to me from the point of purchase to Doomsday, making me regret ever coming into contact with ACDSee. In addition to the spam, ACDSee sees fit to advertise on the user's desktop, as well, turning the home computer into a billboard for their products. Nice way to screw the customer, eh?

You can forget about ACDSee making meaningful improvements to their product, too. The most they will ever do is add a special effect or make a 64-bit version, ten years after 64-bit become the standard. Buying ACDSee entitles the customer to zero updates. Instead, each year, you have to cough up more money, if you ever want the product to be updated again. More money, with no end in sight, malware loaded on to your desktop, and getting spammed to death is the ACDSee way.

One has to wonder how the spammers at ACDSee would feel if their email accounts were spammed on a daily basis.

The scam artists over at ACDSEE do nothing but SPAM their customers. Unsubscribe, you say? Sure, they will IGNORE your unsubscribing and KEEP SPAMMING YOU until the day you die, except they keep spamming that email address whether you are dead or not, because it is automatic. There is no one monitoring the unsubscribe, no real, functioning process for unsubscribing, only a fake process to assume the appearance of legality. Once you buy, you get spammed 'til you die--and beyond. ACDSee has one purpose: SPAM in order to make money. Today, I just noticed I am getting a pop-up everytime I open ACDSee. "Your license has been used too often. Purchase a new license." Too often, eh? I installed ACDSee on 2 machines, and my license entitles me to 3 installs. ACDSee does not know how to count. This fits with their general level of stupidity. Giving money to that outfit is just money down the drain, they keep wanting more, more, MORE. Harass and annoy the customer until he or she forks over more cash is the ACDSee way.

ACDSee Stinks!

The Deep, Deep Desire of Republicans

The government on Republicans is like the brain on drugs. Here's a case example. There are thousands of examples like this. Government is abandoned, neutralized, as big business screws the consumer any which way to Friday. Workers have no rights, the country's infrastructure crumbles, and the educational system gets to be a joke. In Europe, meanwhile, people enjoy 1 Gigabyte internet speeds, while the people voting to "Make America Great Again," lag behind at 1.5mb -- if they're lucky.

Which brings me to my point. Republicans vote against their own self-interests. It is as if they have a strange deep, deep desire to let all the big businesses to do the nasty from behind. They want to lose money; they want to be poor, and they want their children to be poor, too. It is an odd sort of desire, but that's Republicans for you. Don't like themselves, don't like their families, want to fail, want to suffer. Slow internet? Great! Poor education? Super! Crumbling roads and traffic accidents? Heaven! Make America like 1850 again!

Capitalism is fine and dandy, but there needs to be some kind of sheriff around to make sure big business doesn't just set all the rules. Ever heard of the term, "monopoly power?" That's when a big business can just set prices and service levels any which way it chooses. That is the situation with Internet in this country, which is coming to look like a Third-World country. Trump has done zip, in fact he has made the situation far worse for people by gutting the FCC and all the other federal agencies. He is making America look like 1850, whereas the Chinese are light-years ahead of us already. The truth is that businesses will want to relocate to China to enjoy better roads, better transportation, better Internet, more advanced everything. America will resemble Africa. Thanks a lot, Trump. I guess he and his tribe plan to relocate to China after they've finished their hack job on America.

The Mighty "P"

Really we have a phallic-phobic society on our hands.

I remember back in the day all kinds of horrible traumatic things at high school, condoned and in some cases instigated by school teachers and administration. These things will never be investigated, publicized or lawsuits filed, and no one will have their career ended over them. They just happened and warped minds and altered lives. Oh, well! So, we had a sorrier generation as a result, because the elders were screwballs that did not know what time of day it was and did not really care to do their duty and do right by the young ones.

What is getting publicized, investigated, lawsuits filed and millions collected? Why, anything at all involving an active penis! Oh, my! If such an organ is involved, stop the presses! Suddenly it becomes a crucial problem of enormous significance.

Really, there is a lot of hypocrisy all around. People acting self-righteous and channeling their Puritan ancestors, as though they don't squat every day over the toilet.

Now in regards to our latest Supreme Court nominee, my own personal inclination, at first, was, what's the big deal. Teenagers do stupid stuff. And drinking? Well, girls going to an unchaperoned party where boys are drinking is not the best and the brightest idea in the world.

However, I also think someone aspiring to become a LIFELONG JUDGE on the SUPREME COURT, should be held to a higher standard than the other 99% of us. Like, I am not aspiring to such a high and mighty position. Think about it. A Supreme Court justice is probably more powerful than your average U.S. Senator. Because they never face elections and can do pretty much as they damn well please. What we need are impartial, non-partisan seekers of the objective Truth, and upright moral and ethical SAINTS, as well. A really tough bill to fill, no doubt, but the country has many to choose from and plenty of applicants.

So, that is my position in a nutshell. No, I don't think Kavanaugh should get arrested or be removed from whatever current job or position he has now. However, a lifelong appointment to the most prestigious court in the land seems wrong, when he has attacked the women-folk, according to sworn testimony, which he disputes. True, it's all in the distant past, and memories can be vague beasts, but that certainly has not helped the Roman Catholic Church one iota, now has it? My notion is that these women, and there are more than just one, don't like him on a personal level. They knew him as a young man, found him to be a bully, and remember certain words and deeds, and have trouble reconciling that with the notion of him sitting on the Supreme Court. Certainly, a bully is not someone anyone should want as a judge.

There is also the problem of Kavanaugh being just a total tool and complete lackey for the Republican party. Whatever happened to independent judiciary? This guy has been paying dues to politicians all his life. He is nominated, not due to his scholarship or eloquence, but for payback, and this is pretty clear to anyone with eyes to see. He sounds angry, not because the charges against him are without merit, but because he sees all he worked so hard for, just about to slip out of his grasp. My, how those who crave power do rage! Don't worry old salt, there's a keg o' beer waiting for ye when ye get home. Just drown out your sorrows, but don't throw any mixed-gender parties, is my advice.

Now all of this does not necessarily mean the right-wing doesn't get their Justice. Go get your justice, just nominate someone nicer. That is my advice. Due to Republicans being lazy as the day is long, they just don't want to put forth any effort into getting a new one. So, vote for Kavanaugh and reap what ye sow. He can always be impeached, when the Democrats get in. There will be something on him, or maybe the Democrats can just make something up, like Trump does all the time, on a daily basis. Apparently we are living in a post-Truth world with Trump, so my idea is that the Democrats can just impeach all the conservative justices, and be done with them. Just like Trump gets rid of FBI staff he doesn't like.