I'm a Socialite

I'm a late bloomer as far as socializing goes. I was withdrawn as a kid, more confident as a young man, but now that I'm in old fart territory, I feel comfortable chatting with anyone. I'm simply not afraid of anyone or anything, and I'm not intent on selling anyone anything, either. There is the sense of, "Been there, done that, survived it all."

Death

Death places a halo on the head of the dead, because they are blameless. To blame them is as pointless as blaming a rock, tree, or river--they are inanimate. Only the living may be blamed for the problems of today. With the dead, in most cases one thinks, they did the best they could with the resources at hand. Indeed in some cases, it is fantastic they could do what they did do, while laboring under such tremendous handicaps. It is important to forgive and forget whenever possible. To brood upon the past makes us vulnerable to the powers of darkness that are so eager to gain a foothold into our world. Some of those on the global scene that brood over the past are those Republicans who want to do no trade with Cuba, even though our dispute with them is fifty years old, and Cuba is no worse than China, objectively--in fact, China is far more a threat to us. North Korea and Iran brood over the past. Putin broods over the past. Those who idealize the Southern Confederacy, they too brood over the past too much. Live in the present.

Although forgiveness isn't necessary, by any means, I do forgive my dead father all his real or perceived faults without exception. He was more than good enough. He was wonderful, judged in the context of his burden, and that is the only way we should judge other people. It is easy for strong people with sound minds to be proud and powerful when put to the test. They do not have to make as much effort. They do not suffer as much. To be mentally ill is a tremendous burden. Just imagining it is frightening. Living it is worse. I read the list of side effects for his medicine the other day and that helped me understand a great deal.

The reason I have never taken acid or any powerful drug is that I fear the loss of control, the giving of the self over to the Random, to evil spirits, psychosis, or self-hypnosis, or whatever takes its place. This is also the reason that other people abstain from powerful drugs--and also heavy drinking or heavy pot smoking, because even the milder substances, when taken in great excess, can impair our sense of self-control. We do fear the loss of control and are wise to do so.

My father had many good qualities, and most importantly, he intended to do good. Conscience was  powerful in him as it is in me, and this, I think, is the seed of goodness, for without conscience, what guide have we? There is no invisible guardian standing ready to cast black magic upon us, should we do ill to others, although I think there should be. We refrain from evil not so much out of fear of the law or of societal disapproval or for our own insignificant lives, but rather out of fear of committing Sin, which alienates a human being from communion with the consciousness that pervades all things, the Force, as Obi Wan-Kenobi and Yoda described it in "Return of the Jedi." Perhaps that is indeed what God is, rather than a single being. And, perhaps we are not single beings either, and individuality is an illusion, but we are all avatars of the One, and all of us are interconnected, whether we know it or not. Those that are evil delude themselves in thinking they are separate. They are wholly sold on the illusion of individuality. After the brief span of a man's days, the illusion is dispelled. What remains of an evil-doer's savage individuality is a rotting corpse, food for worms. Those that are good perceive, maybe dimly, but they perceive an invisible network connecting all living beings. They exist not only for the benefit of self, but for the benefit of others as well, because the self is transitory, and others will inherit the earth.

Dr. Oz Looks Like The Grinch

Dr. Oz peddles miracle weight-loss products on his show. I think the guy looks like The Grinch, that villain created by Dr. Seuss. Some doctors go into medicine because they want to help people, but a lot go into medicine because they want to make a lot of money. Raspberry ketones, indeed, Dr. Oz.

Sadness

I hate when good people squabble for silly reasons. Mainly due to miscommunication, I think. Tribalism, racism, homophobia, sexism, politics. It makes me sad when they cannot get along. I haven't the power to make them. If I had the power, I would make them. I would bring their heads together like in the Three Stooges. Clonk!

Would that Jesus had summoned the Host and ruled the world as Emperor eternal, wise and just. I always thought the crucifixion made no sense at all. I cannot accept such a sacrifice. Better by far to remain in the world. To ascend into Heaven and sit on the right hand of the Father is laziness. We needed you, and you left us. How is that right? So I do not believe in any of that.

My Stick Figures

The trouble with my writing is the same as with an amateur artist. I write in stick figures. My characters aren't fleshed out, not really, not on the page at least, though they are in my mind. When I read my story, all kinds of images float through my mind, but they have not all been translated into words like they should be. Instead, the characters look like stick figures, just rough outlines. There is too little description, too little detail, and far too much dialogue. Indeed, my stories read like plays. But who really wants to read a play? Not I. I would rather read a story. I need to convert my plays into proper stories, I think. Perhaps it is simply a matter of filling up the bones with flesh.

Sick Actor

Why does Hollywood hire a violent, psychotic and cruel actor, like this piece of work, when there are plenty of good actors to go around? Talent is plentiful. I can attend any play put on at the local college and observe actors who are just as good as the ones I see on television. I don't think there's any room in the cast of any show for someone who would even pretend to skin, kill and eat someone's pet, whether rabbit, cat, or dog. I think such crimes should be prosecuted as felonies, at the very least.

Conservative Liberal Democrats

In Japan, the Liberal Democrats are the conservative party. I'm not sure in what way they are considered conservative, but it probably has to do with the age-old debate between social welfare programs and whatever the opposite is--giving money to the rich, I guess.

Japan also has a Buddhist Komei political party. I don't know what a Buddhist would have to do with politics, but I guess they would favor more temples and less sexual openness. Most religions seem down on sex for some odd reason having to do with our primate origins.

The Liberal Democrats want to expand nuclear power in Japan. I approve in general of nuclear power, but think that Japan should not use it, because that island is so vulnerable to volcanoes, tsunamis, and earthquakes. I think the U.S. should certainly use nuclear power in order to reduce our dependency on fossil fuels that produce greenhouse gases. Yes, there is danger in nuclear power, but our options are limited at this point in time. I believe the U.S. has adequate supplies of uranium in order to fuel nuclear reactors. Most of our major cities, especially those located safely away from the ocean, in the interior, should derive 100% of their power from nuclear reactors.

CEO's

The Sony hack came about because some high-powered CEO opened an email and executed code written by malicious hackers. Why am I not surprised? Now Sony loses millions of dollars, all because of a CEO earning millions of dollars a year for inhabiting a suit and talking BS all day long. CEO's are not worth their coffee mugs, and yet in the U.S., they earn hundreds of times more than the hardest-working employees at their companies. The easiest way to bring a company down is by targeting its weakest link--the CEO, who knows nothing about anything other than the buttons to speed-dial their massage therapist.

Where Republicans and Democrats Differ

The difference between Republicans and Democrats is that Republicans are for torture. Democrats believe torture is morally wrong. That single issue defines the political parties better than any other. Nothing more really needs to be said about politics in the United States. If you vote Republican, you believe it is OK to torture a prisoner. Plain and simple, open and shut, end of story.

I believe some issues are pretty simple. Either you possess one moral alignment or another. I think it is evil to torture prisoners for whatever reason. It is distasteful and unworthy and low. It makes us like the stinking Nazis or the filthy Communists. I think that people who would do that, would do a lot of other things as well, and therefore cannot be trusted. If moral considerations of grave consequence can be so easily set aside, if one can so readily inflict immense suffering upon a defenseless human, then one is aligned with the darkness, and evil will result. The servant of darkness may not understand and may think they know better, but that is nevertheless the way.

The issue of torture presents a particularly thorny problem for Christians and may make them quite cross, but perhaps some of those who profess so loudly their religiosity in public, praying and speaking of God at every occasion, perhaps they reason their way around the problem, thinking that after all, they're always right, and God is always on their side, just because they believe such-and-such, and therefore, and what not. They have not reasoned their way out of a paper bag. They are still in the bag.

Cheney defends torture on the basis of its supposed effectiveness. I'm amused that he never really comes right out and says he supports torture. All of these right-wingers are using mealy-mouthed terms like "enhanced interrogation techniques" which sounds like so much BS. Just say torture. Cut the crap, tell it like it is. We will respect you more for 'fessing up. You tortured helpless prisoners, okay? Just say so. Either these torturers feel guilty, which seems doubtful, or they're playing word games for political reasons, which seems likely.

I don't care whether torture is effective or not. It's just ugly. It's going a step too far, and one always wonders, what if the tables were turned? Who among us would want to be tortured? To be killed is one thing. Death does not seem so bad by comparison. I can accept death better than being kept alive only to experience indignities, agony and misery. I have to wonder how Cheney would feel being subjected to the very same torture he assigned to his helpless prisoners.

There is value in maintaining the moral high ground. Cheney sacrificed the moral high ground readily for almost no return. It is as though he sees no value in morality and does not understand why other people do. Perhaps Cheney thinks Democrats are stupid for caring about torture. If good is stupid, then stupid is good. I rather think that Cheney is stupid for failing to comprehend the greater good.

Where I Get My Traffic

You may wonder where Glorious Igor gets all his traffic. Like for instance if you have no life and actually give a hoot about some over-the-hill blogger.

The answer is like I said before, 99% of my traffic is spam and malware sites from Russia that target and want to infect me and probably other bloggers. I don't know whether the KGB is still in business these days or whether it was renamed to some other acronym, but Putin's a bad actor and certainly spreads evil tentacles through cyberspace trying to infect, annoy or otherwise harm perceived and actual enemies.

A dumbass novice blogger or technically unsophisticated blogger would out of vanity click on one of those sites and expose their computer to a malware attack and also reveal their IP address, so that even if their computer is not compromised, their identity is, at least in part. Once someone has an IP address, they have a pretty effective way to determine who is who, unless the visitor is using a proxy or public wireless, etc., but even then, there are trails and there are trails...

I never click on such sites. If I don't recognize the site, to hell with it. I am somewhat interested in the search terms that lead people to my blog. That is perhaps the only valid and useful stat. I know that people read me because of dungeon crawl, solydx, and to a lesser extent other linux thingamajiggies. I know that people could not give a damn about my opinions on philosophy, my stories and my opinions on politics, but I also know that I don't give a damn whether they give a damn, and I write what I please anyway. Sometimes people do read my stuff by accident no doubt and once in a blue moon, I think when someone is under the influence of a substance, they will leave a comment letting me know their reaction. That can be fun, although a lot of comments have spam links or are left solely for the purpose of promoting another site.

Into the Calm

The best advice an old friend ever gave me was about self-control. He said if one is aware of a fault, that is, one that cannot be entirely eliminated, then besides reducing its frequency, for instance by abstaining from alcohol, there is yet another trick. When the inner eye observes the faulty logic executing, much in the same way an anti-virus would apprehend malware, one seizes the runaway process and stops it. "There I go again, so unnecessary and pointless," was the phrase he used. I find this an effective technique to defuse anger, for instance, which is such a negative emotion of limited utility in our modern world, although it may have had a purpose long ago. There are individuals that try their darnedest to provoke us into anger, because they feed upon that much as the dung-beetle feeds upon its chosen meal. I think avoidance of these types of people and ignoring their provocations may be the best strategy. When they do not get any notice of their remarks, then they do not get any satisfaction. The entire reason they provoke is to receive drama that is lacking in their lives, because no one with any sense wants to be around them for any length of time.

Fatal Error in Zot Defense

Before you ask, I already reported this bug or one like it many moons ago. I have no right to complain about a free game really, so this isn't a complaint per se, just a wailing to the gods. Perhaps Kikubaaqudgha, in my case. Oh Kiku ! Why hast thou forsaken me? And devs, please tell us, why must there be a fatal error that crashes the game and stops the show? I was having fun. . . I do so love Zot Defense! Well, I don't really know any way around this error, and it always without fail pops up in Zot Defense, so there we are.

The monsters should be smart enough to figure out that they can fight their way through apparent obstacles such as plants and fireballs, and that those obstacles do not block their path. So if no other path is found, then let the algorithm choose a less desirable path that requires removing a removable obstacle.

Ten Cokes a Day

Yeah. Reminds me of Super-Size Me. One thing I gained from that article is that I need to knock off the fruit juice.

Don't Have to Be Perfect

Accepting that one doesn't have to be perfect is key to mental health and avoidance of depression. When I notice a fault, I try to find the humor in it rather than getting down about it. In the first place, being aware of a fault is a positive and should not be interpreted as a negative. At least awareness opens up the possibility of addressing or compensating for known faults. But people who just constantly pick and find faults in other people are unpleasant, and one doesn't wish to be around them.

I don't think a complicated top-heavy animal (big brain, frail body) can be perfect. There are going to be limitations, particularly in the functioning of the brain and personality. One isn't going to meet the standards of everyone one encounters. But all of that is OK, for the simple reason everyone is in the same boat. Since everyone's headed to the boneyard, even if there are some geniuses or strongmen nearby or out there in the wide world, as they age they will lose, one by one, in stages or suddenly, those gifts they once had, so in a way, we're all equal, except for very, very brief spurts of activity. What are 1 - 100 years in the cosmic sense of time, which is measured in billions of years if it is measured at all? Some say the Universe begins and ends, and others say it regenerates itself, and there are other theories, but the consensus is that the Universe is around for a length of time unimaginable to our brains... billions of years. So man is a flash in the pan.

I mean, all humans are doing pretty well compared to the ancestors, bacteria or amoebas or whatever, pond scum floating around and soaking up cosmic rays until random mutations led to us.

Ban on Books?

I usually think of the UK as enlightened in most matters not pertaining to marijuana, so I was surprised to learn that the meatheads running the prisons over there banned books. Finally, a judge has ruled that the ban is unlawful. The wardens say they are worried about books being used for drug smuggling. Drugs, schmugs. A couple joints getting through is no reason to deny books to everybody in the joint. It's not like a joint is going to blow up the joint. In fact, a little marijuana once in a while should be distributed to prisoners as a reward for good behavior. Learning to love reading really is just the thing to rehabilitate a criminal into a normal human being. Besides, honestly who the hell else is going to buy any books in this video-besotted age? At least keep the prison market open for the starving authors.

Writing

I do think I've written some half-way decent short stories in my day. My ambition in life has always been to compile a pretty large volume of stories and essays and publish somewhere where I can feel fairly confident that the work will persist after my demise. Money or power as an end unto itself has never interested me; I just want enough money to be reasonably comfortable in lower-middle class or rather upper lower-class squalor, and as for power, I want the power that comes with freedom from debt and freedom in the sense of liberty.

I would hate for all my work to be destroyed and no one ever see it again. I think that if I bother to write about something, then perhaps it is important after all, perhaps I am even moved by something like the zeitgeist, because I have noticed that things I am very passionate about, such as marijuana and gay rights, have gained ascendency even in my own lifetime. And although I am nominally atheist I do not rule out the hypothesis that maybe an intelligence greater than my own moves me. We humans are such simple beings, you know, that it should not be terribly difficult to play us like violins, I would think, if one were a reasonably respectable alien form of life, dwelling not necessarily out of reach. Who really knows what unusual forms an alien can take, and whether they really need a form at all? Anything seems possible with Quantum Physics.

I like writing just because there is a certain delight to be had in creating something, particularly something that imitates life. Really, being a writer is the closest a mere mortal can come to being a god. I like transcending my own existence, my own biological and self-imposed limitations and creating a new universe with new rules and new people that seem, oh so real to me sometimes, and more compelling in some ways even. I guess I like to be There, on vacation, like, rather than Here all the time. Here is great, don't get me wrong. But There is nice, too.

Tolkien is probably the writer I admire most, because the universe he created was so utterly compelling and absorbing. In fact, with the Simarillion, he created a theology rather superior to the one he professed. He was wise to keep it out of his main work. In the Lord of the Rings, much is left unmentioned, such as, who is Gandalf really and who is Sauron? Where do the Elves go at the end? Well, all of the backstory is revealed in the Simarillion. In fact, I think Tolkien made a plausible extension of the Christian mythology.

Manners

Whether one is right or left on the political sphere, I'm convinced the way to get along in the world is good manners. There is incivility to be found in both houses. I think that social skills are more difficult to grasp than some suppose. So much emphasis nowadays is on technical skills. But social skills are the grease that keeps the engine of society running smoothly.

Quantum Physics

I wonder how many people can follow quantum mechanics. It's traditional, old-school science I like and understand, that is, the science prior to 1920. After Einstein, everything got weird. In school, I was taught primarily Newtonian physics, which handicapped my understanding of the Universe, but that remains at heart my understanding of things. When I read, for instance in the biography of Richard Feynman, that electrons can travel backward and forward in time, just as they travel backward and forward through space, it does not compute, and I do not understand the math either, nor even the high-level explanations or the "easy" analogies offered. I don't understand what is meant by the idea that time has no meaning or does not exist or is strange in a way that I cannot directly observe. To me, time is real. I observe things change, and they do not revert to what they were, either. Perhaps my limitations are biological in nature, and I'm not meant to divine such mysteries. To me, quantum physics reads like magic, and the physicists, like Feynman, are sorcerors that can tap into dangerous, double-edged supernatural forces.

Terrorism

Every time I read the world news, terrorists are killing people in Africa or the Middle East and sometimes even in a civilized country in Europe or the Americas.

Terrorists seem to think of politics as a numbers game, where the more casualties, the bigger their "victory." When dealing with an immoral, absolutely evil foe with such a medieval mindset, it is important to adhere to a 1000:1 ratio for every single life harmed, with the ratio being filled by the homelands, neighborhoods and hiding places of the terrorists. By eliminating the sources of the terrorists, where they are bred, educated and trained, terrorism is eliminated, both in the present and the future. When no more terrorists are born, then there will be no more terrorism. Terrorism is simply a disease, and the way to eradicate disease is the same employed by the body's own immune system. One finds the source of infection, swarms and destroys, and then disposes of the waste. It's a mystery why governments around the world waste trillions of dollars on never-ending wars that drag on decade after decade, when the solution is rather simple and direct. By treating symptoms merely, and not eliminating the sources of infection, we ensure the problem persists into perpetuity. The Romans knew how to deal with terrorism. We can take a page or two from their playbook and quit playing around with terrorists. If they don't want to observe the rules of war, fine, two can play that game.

GOP Staffer

If you're a staffer for a political party, then you want to stay anonymous, or at least not become known for something boneheaded like this.

Hey, pray for a brain while you're at it. Geez.