Before you ask, no, I'm not making this up.
Man attacks police officer with penis.
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Surreal
Truth is stranger than fiction. Some of the things I read in the media, I don't think anybody could make up.
The F.B.I. photoshopped a picture of a Spanish M.P. and passed it off as an age-progression photo of Bin Laden.
The F.B.I. photoshopped a picture of a Spanish M.P. and passed it off as an age-progression photo of Bin Laden.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
According to Leviticus
"According to Leviticus, shaving one's beard is a sin. Getting a tattoo or wearing a cotton-poly T-shirt (or any garment of mixed fiber) will also incur God's wrath."
-source: p.85, "Are You Kidding Me? Fun Facts that Feel Like They Can't Be True," by Harry Bright and Jakob Answer.
-source: p.85, "Are You Kidding Me? Fun Facts that Feel Like They Can't Be True," by Harry Bright and Jakob Answer.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
New Year's Resolutions
A friend of mine resolved that from now on, he would reject any glass of wine offered at a party. I asked him what his policy would be on beer. "That," he said, "will be decided on a case-by-case basis."
Friday, July 24, 2009
I Like Big Words and I Cannot Lie
(Sung to the tune of "I Like Big Butts," by Sir Mix-a-Lot)
I like big words and I cannot lie
You other writers can't deny
That when a sentence flows past with an itty bitty base
And a long word in your face
You get sprung
Wanna pull up tough
Cuz you notice that word was stuffed
Deep in the letters she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, baby I wanna get with ya
And use your literature
My editors tried to warn me
But that word you got
Make Me so verbey
Ooh, word of lengthy definition
You say you wanna get in my blogs
Well use me use me cuz you aint an adverb
I'm tired of magazines
Saying small words are the thing
Take this writer and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
I like 'em multi-syllabic and big
And when I'm writin' a blog
I just can't help myself
I'm actin like an animal
Now here's my scandal
Yeah baby
When it comes to words
Cosmo ain't got nothin to do with my selection
Ten or fewer letters?
Only if I can't come up with a fifty-dollar word like amelioration.
I like big words and I cannot lie
You other writers can't deny
That when a sentence flows past with an itty bitty base
And a long word in your face
You get sprung
Wanna pull up tough
Cuz you notice that word was stuffed
Deep in the letters she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, baby I wanna get with ya
And use your literature
My editors tried to warn me
But that word you got
Make Me so verbey
Ooh, word of lengthy definition
You say you wanna get in my blogs
Well use me use me cuz you aint an adverb
I'm tired of magazines
Saying small words are the thing
Take this writer and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
I like 'em multi-syllabic and big
And when I'm writin' a blog
I just can't help myself
I'm actin like an animal
Now here's my scandal
Yeah baby
When it comes to words
Cosmo ain't got nothin to do with my selection
Ten or fewer letters?
Only if I can't come up with a fifty-dollar word like amelioration.
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techlorebyigor is my personal journal for ideas & opinions